You ever been in a situation where someone you love, would bet their life that you don’t love them? I have been on both sides of this frustrating scenario and for years I was missing an important piece to the complex puzzle of love –love languages. Love languages are the categories in which you can give and receive love. When a friend, family member or significant other does not communicate their love to you in the way that you comprehend it, you will miss their efforts. Acts of service, words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch and gift receiving are the prominent Love Languages.

If I am a woman who translates words of affirmation into love and an affectionate friend is constantly giving me hugs and pats on the back without affirming me with their words, I may feel unloved in our friendship. Or if I show love by giving gifts, and I am in a relationship with someone who reads love mostly through physical touch or acts of service, my attempts to demonstrate “I love you” will constantly go unrecognized or will eventually grow old. If you and someone you care about are dealing with miscommunication or one of you are feeling under appreciated.  You may be missing each other’s love languages.

A part of love is the ability to extend yourself in a way that may feel uncomfortable or unsatisfying to you in order to make someone else feel love and appreciated. Discernment is important when it comes to fulfilling another’s needs, as you never want to be taken advantage of. However to love and be loved you have to take the risks.

Understanding in your relationships how the ones you love give and receive love can ease communication and build stronger, long lasting bonds. Take the Love Languages Test to find out your love language, and share it with the ones you care about.

Photo by William Stitt